Standing Egg.

Sunday morning and I skipped church.

I was planning to stay awake after (nearly) finished my paper because I had been sleeping all day on Saturday.  

But I fell asleep at about 4.00 and of course when my mom wakes me up, I could not wake up and decided to sleep.  

I was so sleepy and of course when we are tired, we act accordingly to our body (well maybe it's only me who lacks of determination).

Yes Taeyeon, you're my little star..
Hope she will sing Little Star someday
since she's my fav singer.

Sigh.

Fortunately I sent a message to my brother asking him to buy me i-Cup's Green Tea Green Apple and Green Tea Kiwi with rainbow jelly.  

It tastes really good!

Thank God I can work on my paper without much difficulties(or maybe I just did it because I do not know what to do anymore, I'm suck at making paper *cry silently*

Okay, I have been searching about Urban Zakapa after listening to "Just The Two of Us" and I found so many good song by Urban Zakapa!  

But when I was in the middle searching for more, my friend suggest me to look for Standing Egg.  

It's a strange name right?  

But after listening to one of their song, I fell in love with the male voice!

And one of the reason why I fell asleep is because I was listening to Little Star by Standing Egg.  

It is nice and the male voice just like singing lullaby for you so you can sleep peacefully.  

And after I wake up, I searched for the lyrics.  

So this is the lyric's translation :

Close your eyes and listen carefully to my story

Before my story ends, you will dream

Little star tonight

All night, I will watch over you

When I first met you, it was truly eye-blinding

When I first saw your smile, I felt like I had the whole world

Little star tonight

All night, I will watch over you

When I see you fast asleep in my arms

I can’t take my eyes off you for a second

You’re so pretty – I feel like my breath will stop

How can I fall asleep?

My love, my everything, my angel from heaven

My two eyes, my world – you stole them all

Little star tonight

All night, I will watch over you

When I see you fast asleep in my arms

I can’t take my eyes off you for a second

You’re so pretty – I feel like my breath will stop

How can I fall asleep?

Close your eyes and listen carefully to my story

Before my story ends, you will dream

Little star tonight

All night, I will watch over you

My love tonight

All night, I will watch over you

All night, I will watch over you

(cr: popgasa.com)

See?  This is a lullaby, a romantic one to be precise.  

Well for those who already have boyfriend, you can imagine your boyfriend sing this song to you while playing guitar.  

But for me, I imagine that I sing this song to my niece or nephew while she/he is going to sleep or sing it while hugging a pug let it to sleep in my embrace (if you ask why, because I want a pug as a pet and pug is just too cute! :3).

So, because I am a subjective person, if I like one of the song (USUALLY) I will like it all.

one pack just for my bangs..and it's still brownish
maybe I need more...

I like all of Standing Egg's song (well, maybe not all because I'm not finish searching) because it's all relaxing and it's good to play if while you're doing your homework (it works well with me because I can finish one of my paper).

And this Little Star is good to listen before you sleep.  Sleep well! :P

The second term of mid-test is on Monday, and I have to prepare myself.

But the paper is so stressing, so I relieve my stress by......bleaching my bangs.

I know it is a weird way to relieve the stress, but that's how I do it! Having my hair cut or dyeing it will relieve my stress.  Moreover I love to express myself through my hair.

Looks alay? Never mind!  I love it! :)

Random Post : My Tour Beats by Dre.

Mine! 

 Okay, long time no see?  I'm doing one of many assignments but I decided to write this since my head really hurts after reading so much.  I'm doubting my choice entering IR (again..).

So, because I lost my original earphone for my iTouch (Still wondering did I drop it? Or did the maid steal it from me?  Okay, positive thinking!  Maybe careless me really drop it somewhere...  Goodbye good earphone! *silently cried*), I brought this tour with me today to campus since I had to stay at campus quite long and life is boring without music.

This is the second (I think..) thing I bought with my own money, my own salary after I bought my precious Angry Birds bed sheet so it will match with my Angry Birds blanket (it's 'balmut' actually.)

I bought it because it's cable is unique.  And I have many earphones and having trouble with its cable because it tangles easily.  So when I saw this Tour Beats, I think it's unique.  I like the color and design, also the cable because it's not tangled easily.  I like this!

But of course, after seeing the price...  It's expensive.

So I decided to bury the dream of having this earphone.

White and Black(and red) beats.

Maybe it's the fate(?) that my beloved cousin showed me his new Tour to me the next month.  It's the OEM version, he said.  Okay, since I'm not an expert so I can't differentiate the genuine or the fake one. And I'm still confused with the definition of OEM.  Let's say because I tried the in-earphone and I thought it's good, also the price is not too expensive (I mean, I can afford myself.) so I decided to buy it.

Many people said that it's not a good earphone.  But for me it's perfect.

It seals completely when I listen to the music so I can't hear the sound from outside and the bass is enough for me.  I'm not audiophile, an expert, or anything.  But its sound, its shape is perfect for me so I bought it.  Although yes, I can't use it while sleeping because it will hurts when I'm leaning on my side.

I also bought the white one for my brother as a present on his birthday.  At first when I bought mine, he was like jealous and told me that mine is not good.  There is something better than this.  But I bought one for him, hide it under his pillow.  And when he found it, he felt really happy.  and...nearly cried? :P Admit it bro, you love it, don't you?  If not, then I will gladly take it back!  *evil laugh*

Comparison

 So...  Yeah..  After getting the white Tour I was hesitating because the white one is also beautiful. And I was thinking that I could keep it by myself (of course, since it's bought with my own money I have the right to keep it right?) but I decided to give it to bro, according to my early intention bought the white one.

So...  After some time, I ask my bro to switch the earpiece.  The white earpiece is so tempting, so finally I asked him and he agreed.  We switch, he has the black one while I'm having the white earpiece and I'm using it now.

And later..  I was kinda...  awkward?  Because me and my brother used to have same things.  Like my iTouch.  My bro has it too.  Although he has 32GB iTouch while mine is 64GB (and I don't feel the memory is enough since I often put random songs and videos.)  We used to have match shirts at the elementary, etc.

Mine(left), Bro's(right)

And I'm thinking what to buy for my little sister, I have bought her couple key chain (for me and my little sister) because we're look alike and can't be apart.

I used to go quite far and every time I go she always fell sick.  Poor her.  Although now she's really really (sometimes actually) annoying.  I still love her and I want to give her something.  It feels nice as an older sister to be able to make my lil' bro-sist happy.  Also feels great too to have your parents happy. Right?

Actually I'm feeling not well now.  And I think I wrote this badly.  My neck hurts since few days ago.  I can't concentrate driving if it continues like this.  I skip my BIHI too this morning because I had extreme headache and decided to get more sleep, hoped the headache would go away but it's not.

There will be important event at the end of the month and I'm not feeling well..  I hope everything will go well....

Comparing...  Again.

The Earpieces

Donating Blood.

I think it was 14 April 2011, where I still in highschool.

A white van entered our school and that's when I had my first experience in donating blood.

So I went with my friends to donate our blood because I was 18 and it means that I'm allowed to donate my blood.  

We were really curious about donating blood because of course we haven't experienced it before (except for those who had their blood taken for the test.  I used to have my blood taken to, but it was when I still 5 maybe?).

First we have to fill a form about ourselves whether we have allergies, or any diseases that will prevent us from donating blood because it will be dangerous for the receiver later.

After filling the form, I went to check my weight, blood-pressure, and my blood type.

The officer cleaned the tip of my ring finger and put something like pen then "click", I felt a sting then I saw my finger bleeding quite much.

The officer took it carefully to check the hemoglobin and my blood type.

I was sure that my blood type is B because my mother said that.  And I love checking the characteristic of "B" type people and I thought.. YES, I'm a blood B.

But the officer says that I'm an O-type, it means that I get the same as my mom who says that I'm a B-type.

(Mom, I had lived my 18 years thinking that I'm a B-type!  Feels like an eagle who lives with the chicken and doesn't know that it can fly high because it's eagle!  Not a chicken!  I'm an O-type!  Not a B-type!  LOL!  I'm exaggerating it. ;))

After knowing my blood type, and qualified to donate blood, they gave me a...what I should call it?  Blood bags?  It's written an O-type with positive rhesus.  I wait for my turn to donate blood because it was quite crowded.  After some time, I became more and more nervous.  What if it hurts like when we get an injection?

Although worrying about the pain, my turn had come and I slowly walk to the chair.

Another officer greeted me, and asking me whether I'm afraid of needles or not.

"No.", I said.

She then tried to find my vein, but after some time, she still couldn't find it even she tried on my other hand and it's still hard to find.

She finally able to see a little and decided to clean the area where she would jab the needle.

Fortunate me, she's a skillful one.  One of my friend whined because the officer who took his blood is still a newbie.  She inserted the needle a little bit slow and her hands were shaky, making it painful for my friend.

The needle inserted into my vein and the blood start pouring out.  I'm amazed to see the crimson red blood, my own blood flowing out from my body to the blood-bag near the chair on a digital scale.

Well, it hurts earlier, but it doesn't hurt at all when the blood is flowing out (except you keep moving your arm so the needle won't stay still).

I finished a little bit late because the officer said that my blood is hard to come out, even she used the tool to measure blood pressure a few times (which left few red marks on my upper hand after it) and asking me to pump it by making my hand into a fist then open it and do it again a few times.

Finally the blood bag was full and she cut it before letting another cc of my blood to use it as a sample.

I don't feel anything wrong and happily receive the delicious food provided by the school and the PMI.

That day I felt really happy, don't know why but I felt really happy because I feel like I'm able to give something, to help someone in need.

Mom and Dad

Another lazy day.

I have to admit that I'm lazy, I like doing something simple for certain things.

My mom has been telling me that I have to tidy my bedroom.

I have many things in my room, there're cables and jacks, guitars, and some stickdrums.

Well, I have many books and things, I love to keep many things because its memories like some presents from my friends and cousins, although it's broken I still keep it because of its memories.

And to make things worse, there're many things that aren't mine but it's placed in my room, that's why I never take a good care of those which aren't mine.

But I really take care of my things well! (I guess..)

For example, Nite.  Nite is my accoustic-electric (what should I call it?  Semi-accoustic?  Semi-electric guitar?)

Applause, by Ovation.  This black guitar is my Christmas present from my someone special (from my family).  And a "home" for Nite, a black cool hardcase to protect my guitar because I often bring it to school or church.  And not only a guitar, she let me to buy a stompbox.  Behringer hot pink SUPER METAL!

Accompanied by my cousin (thanks for taking me looking around, and for the pancakes!), I bought those things not to forget I bought the most expensive guitar strings I've ever seen too!  (I know maybe there'll be more strings expensive than this certain brand, but my Nite's strings is the most expensive I've ever bought). Then some good additional cables.

Because it's new, I take care of them very well.

I clean my Nite everytime I finish playing then put it slowly in the case, I place the cables and not to forget clean it if I bring the cables outside and place it gently.

But my mom doesn't know this.  She says I'm a lazy person. :(

I seldom playing guitar now, but I will take a good care everytime I play.
Actually I lost the battery case when I was doing my final and of course..  I can't find it anywhere now..
I'm sorry Nite~, I'm really sorry.. :|

People may call me stingy, because I SOMETIMES don't want to share with others.
For example, I bought my own sheets because I don't want the others to use it.
I also want to have my own nail-clippers and something like that because I don't want people to lose it, making me mad because they don't take a good care of those things.. That's why..

Am I stingy?  Really?  I don't think so..  Maybe..
Argh~!  I'm so tired! "Hunyaaaang~" *Alligator Yawn* to day is the birthday of my father and he is going out with my mother, picking my bro and sist up from their school and do some business while me...
Staying at home by myself, and a maid who's older than me but really love watching cartoon.

Actually I want to go out too, but I can't since I was preparing making surprise for my father.
I tried to look dumb, forgetting my own father birthday although I seldom forget it (and my father is the one who often forgets).
Everything has been done now, but they're still out and I'm starting to feel sleepy.

By the way, I bought Tiramisu Cake for my father because he said that he likes it.
I bought it by saving for a few weeks and use my remaining salary and looking for the online cake shop.
I asked my mom to help me to transfer the money and of course I gave the money to my mom, but she gave it back.
I had forced her to take it back but she kept resisting me, so I treat her and my little bro-sist.
We ate at Tokyo Connection without letting my dad knows about it and I feel happy to see my sister's happy face.  She really likes sushi (me too~) and I always want to make my family happy although sometimes I have a fight with my bro-sist.

Well, I will upload my father's birthday cake next time.  Now I'm feeling nervous, my hands are shaky because I'm in over-excited mode.. *sigh*  my stomach hurts everytime I feel nervous or excited.

Wish me luck, I hope my dad will forgive me because I pretend to forget his birthday.
Happy birthday BABEH! :D

Death.

Have you ever think about your own death?

Have you ever think where will you go after you're dead?

Have you ever think, what will remain after you're gone?

What will you say, in the last minute before the angel of death picks you up?

Nothing will stay after you're dead, your flesh will be gone eaten by maggots, your bones will slowly turn into ashes.

I've wondering what will I say when I'm going to death, the moment death will come to me I will say "God help me!".

The moment when you suddenly slipped and is going to hit the floor, sometimes there will be pictures like a film about important moments to you appears in your mind.  At the times when you think that you're going to die, and that's what I've said when I suddenly slipped when walking downstairs at my home.

Why I will say "God help me!"?  Because I think that I haven't done anything meaningful for me or people around me.  And of course I haven't know what kind of place I will be if I'm dead, will I be nothing after I'm dead?  Just..perished?

One of my lecturer used to tell us that everyone knows when they're going to face their death.  We knows when the angel of death is preparing to pick us up.  And it can be seen through few stages.

the first is DENIAL, 'penyangkalan'.

No one will be thankful that they're going to die.  Normal people won't be happy if they feel that they're going to die.  The thought of death is something scary and they will try not to think about it because it's scary.  We're all afraid of death because we don't know what will happen to us after we're dead.  Although some religions tell us that we're going to heaven or hell, still... We will experience this fear of death although it will be in different levels each person.

For example, A has cancer and the doctor tell A that he has no hope, they'll act like they're fine, like they're healthy and hoping that the death won't come to them.

the second is ANGER, WRATH, 'marah'.

From the first stage they deny that they're going to die, but no one can't stop the death.  And because they can't stop it, they feel angry to themselves or tries to provoke conflict from people around them by getting angry and blaming all the people around them.  My lecturer told us that in this stage, that people need more love and patience from the people around them so their anger will be gone and they can go to the next stage. If not, they'll keep blaming themselves or people around them and they'll meet their death while still being angry and of course everyone wants to die peacefully right?

the third is BARGAINING, 'tawar-menawar'.

After being denial that death will meet them soon, the angel of death still keep coming.  They try to blame themselves or people around them, but the angel of death keep on its pace walking toward them.  They become frustated and helpless like a baby who can't do anything.  They know they can't do anything to stop the death, that's why they will try to persuade the death to come next time, not now, don't know when the next time but not now, not today, not this week or not this month.  They try to exchange what they have so the death won't come soon.

For example, A promised that he will use his life well.  He will utilize his life to serve God, or maybe to do good things for the others by using his time, his money, etc.  At this time A tend to look for God, he will try to be closer to God because he knows that he has no power to stop death therefore he will look for someone who has power, and most of people believe that God is able.

the fourth is DEPRESSION, 'depresi'.

A had denied that he's going to die, the death still come closer.

A had blamed himself and people around him, the death still walking towards him.

A had tried to exchange everything he has so the death will come later, the death is closer to him now.

Depression, it comes when someone believe that he/she can't do anything anymore.  After doing everything they can and the death still will pick them up, they have nothing to do.  All their bitterness, their anger, had shed in the second stage.  They have nothing to do, feeling helpless, they will become more calm and will retire themselves from their daily activity and their hobbies.  They prefer to spend their times sleeping in silence and do nothing like a new born baby who spend most of its time to sleep and preparing for their new life, people who is going to die tend to sleep, dwell in serenity to prepare themselves to face the death.

the fifth and the last stage is RESIGNATION, SUBMISSION, 'pasrah'.

People who experience this stage will feel at ease, they don't have burden anymore and feeling happy.  And... they're ready to face their death.

From those stages, I thought that what we have from the very beginning until now is our practice to face our own death.  Selfish people won't be able to accept the fact that they're going to die someday.  Why?  Because they will try to get all the things in this world, without realizing that their own life is something they have to use well, it's the real precious things we have.  And our life is the only thing we will have to give up someday.  Our life has been with us from the very beginning until now, it has been part of us of course.  That's why learn to share, to give, to sacrifice.  Sacrificing mean we give something important to us, something precious to us for the others.  It can be our money, our time, or everything that's precious for us.  And of course we will feel more empty after sacrificing something.  But I think that much less we had, our fears will diminish.  Why?

Imagine a rich people, he will be more afraid and worried that there can be robber who will take his wealth or maybe take his life away.  Everytime he wants to help people or there's someone asking for his help, he will be more cautious, more alert, afraid that someone who needs his help has certain intention and will be able to hurt him.  His life (not all of the rich people of course) will be more burdensome because of those thoughts if he's selfish and doesn't want to share with others.

But imagine a simple people or unselfish people, they will help people as they can without worries that something will be taken away because he has nothing.  This is a practice for us to let go everything that's important to us, before in the end..  we have to give our life up.  And I hope we're all can face our death in peace, because we've utilized our life well.  Being simple or unselfish it doesn't mean that we're all not allowed to be rich, of course we have to use our talents well and optimize it, but remember to be thankful because all the things we have now is entrusted by God.

STAND UP!

Ireona! (Stand Up!)

Yes, this is my first blog and my first time blogging! *throw confettis*

I have been thinking about making a blog for a long time, but a little bit confused because most of the time I only whine, expressing my anger, and  'galau'.

I use English and a little bit Indonesian (maybe) because I'm trying to improve my English, I'm sorry if the readers (who wants to read me whinning?) can't understand what I wrote.

The holiday is over, now it's my 3rd semester and I'm totally, I repeat, totally troubled.  The ASSignments are hard for me.  FYI, I feel like I'm lost by entering as an IR student.  Really.

But I believe, I do believe, if God let me to be an IR student, He HAS TO have a beautiful plan for me.  The placement test was hard for me and I thought I won't be able to enter as an IR student but I passed!

I still remember the night before the test I couldn't sleep and keep listening to I'm Gonna Be Ready by Yolanda Adams because I'm helpless, and 'tunauni'.  I came out from the room with my head hung low, fortunately I have my cute-and-funny-nearly-one-year-old nephew, Aldrich.  He made me forget about the tests and laughed.  I had done the best and just let Him did the rest.

But...Unfortunately, luckily, too bad, fortunately, what a pity I still don't know it's a blessing or....the other.. to be able to pass the tests.

A kite needs a stronger wind to fly higher

I believe we will be more mature and better after facing our problems each day, but for this IR thingy is too hard for me... I guess..

Forget it, now let's talk about Ireona (Stand Up) by J-Min.

Now she's one of my favorite singer, Korean singer beside Kim Taeyeon, the leader of Girls' Generation.  My other favorite singer is Avril Lavigne and Corinne Bailey Rae.

And me, being subjective, I always love all the songs (actually not all of it) if it's my favorite singer who sings it although yes, I also have the least fav.

Avril's songs will reminds me when I was at 7th, Corinne Bailey Rae 's reminds me when I was at 10th grade, while listening to K-Pop will reminds me about the three months holiday after graduating from highschool where I got very bored and tried to listen to K-Pop.

After looking for the lyrics of Stand Up by J-Min, I found it really interesting and it encourages you to keep holding on (like Avril's song Keep Holding On) no matter what.  The music makes me want to do headbanging although it's not a death metal song.

*Even if life is hard, don’t quit until the end
The sky will protect your side
Your footsteps are heavy, make some noise
You sink down and let out a sigh
But one more time, one more try

Look to the sky confidently
Now is just the beginning
Open your shoulders
Inside of you is someone like you
Don’t give up on your future even if it’s hard
Stand up, hold my hand, take the world

Like how petals fall when time passes
Clouds promise rain
Even if you’re struggling
It can change by whatever the sky wants
Don’t worry, never mind
Wait for that day

Look to the sky confidently
Now is just the beginning
Open your shoulders
Inside of you is someone like you
Don’t give up even if it’s hard, one more time
Stand up, hold my hand, stand up again (Stand up)

Stand up (Stand up)
Raise your head

Please don’t waver
Now is just the beginning
Open your shoulders
Don’t give up even if it’s hard, one more time
Stand up, hold my hand, stand up again

Observe and feel
Even if we’re different, my friend
You’re not alone, stand up again

*Read more: http://www.kpoplyrics.net/j-min-stand-up-lyrics-english-romanized.html#ixzz25VLQguGH 

It's easier to say something than to do it.  I don't know, am I trying to get better or just only try to survive as an IR student?
And I'm quite thankful for two special friends who are willing to help me and encourages me, and they don't hesitate to scold me when I start to fooling around.

Tomorow I will have BIHI and we're told to think about topics for our presentation and paper...ARGH!  I'm going crazy! *singing Kantoi by Zee Avi non-stop*

By the way, have a nice day!  Smile, though your heart is aching..Smile, even though it's breaking..